Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
