Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
well you can't waste a boner
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
