I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
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