Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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