Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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