rhymes with "ouble enetration"
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize