at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
Randomize
