She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize