lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
