i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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