True but thats because hes a fetus.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
