Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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