White coat. Heels.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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