i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize