i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
