where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
