so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
