Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize