Welp...herpes.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize