everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize