think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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