Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i can't believe i had my finger in that
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
Randomize