if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize