i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
The best revenge is premature balding
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
