I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Randomize
