I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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