How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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