week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
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