Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
