i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
