and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Randomize
