i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
