Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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