Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
not ubering you a puppy
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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