Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
