Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize