school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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