This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
