WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize