I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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