Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
