A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
Randomize
