Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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