I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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