I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Please don't give away my fajitas
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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