You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
