her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I understand Curling. That high.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
