i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
