miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Drake has all the answers
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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