The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
