I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
