afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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