the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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