White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Randomize